I Needed a Sarcasm Sign
'Does anyone want to keep the bill?' One of my friends waved the little piece of paper in front of my nose. We'd had dinner at Hello Pasta in Rotterdam and the bill had already been paid. I saw now point in taking that scrap of paper home with me.
'Of course I want to keep it,' I said. 'I want to frame it and put it up on the wall next to my bed.'
Three blank stares came my way. 'Are you serious?'
'No, I'm not. I was being sarcastic. Do I need to hold up a sarcasm sign every time I open my mouth?'
Another three blank stares came my way. Apparently my friends share don't share my love for
sarcasm, nor my love for The Big Bang Theory...
About a week ago, when I had to refrain myself from showering an 8th grade class with sarcasm, I started to notice that most people don't get my sarcastic comments. That's not new to me: in high school I had a friend who was a master of sarcasm and sometimes our conversations were sarcastic from start to end. Since people thought we were totally serious, I made a sarcasm sign that I held up whenever people shot us puzzled looks. During a particularly boring biology class I quickly wrote the word SARCASM in all caps on a sheet of my notepad. From that moment on I always carried it with me. The sign was a bit creased and crumpled and the M was almost invisible because I'd written the first six letters a little too big, but it served it's purpose well.
When I graduated high school, I threw the sign away. I thought I wouldn't need it anymore. I was wrong.
I barely used sarcasm in my first few months of college. Then I met some awesome people who are sarcastic as can be. My sarcasm skills had become a little rusty, so most of the time I was the one asking for a sarcasm sign. Since I usually speak to these people through text messages, I developed an intricit system of emojis to indicate sarcasm. Soon I was back on my old level of sarcasm.
As time passed, I began using sarcasm in real life again. That's where it went wrong. The people around me just don't get it. For the first time I regretted that I threw my sarcasm sign in the trash. There was only one solution: I had to make a new one.
On a lazy Sunday afternoon at my grandparents' house I drew a new sarcasm sign. I used a smaller piece of paper this time, because the last one was too big to be convenient. I also paid extra attention to the size of the letters: this time I didn't want to walk around with a sign that seems to say 'SARCAS'. To make it look fancier, I made an attempt at Art Nouveau lettering. It took a while to color, but it's perfect now. Ladies and gentlemen, behold! My new sarcasm sign!
Pretty, isn't it? I keep it in my bag at all times. Next time I use sarcasm, there won't be a confused silence afterwards. Instead I'll wave my beautiful sarcasm sign. Makes everyone's lives a whole lot easier.
Stay Awesome!
6 Fellow Ramblers
Haha, Sarcasm is the best kind! It's sad only several people are actually literate in the language :(
ReplyDeletexoxo Morning
No one around me seems literate in the beautiful language of sarcasm, and don't even get me started on the lack fluency in the people who are literate...
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TEERRIBLE POSt. I didn't get a single word. This doesn't relate to me AT ALL.
ReplyDeleteHahaha, this comment wins at life XD Amazing XD
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I solemnly swear that I am up to no good! Wait, no, I mean: I solemnly swear that I will answer each and every comment ;)