I see hundreds of unfamiliar faces every day; In the streets, on the bus, on the subway and at college. Hundreds of unknown people cross my path every week. They don't notice me and I don't really see them either... But sometimes one of those  strange faces catches my eye. Once it's done that, it keeps happening: suddenly that person is everywhere. I see them at lunch, in the hallways and in the library. I see them wherever I go. That face becomes familiar, but the person behind it remains unknown. Every time that happens, my curiosity goes into overdrive. Just a few weeks ago, it happened again...

He was sitting in front of me in the lecture hall. He hadn't caught my eye when he entered the slightly cramped hall, nor did he do so when he bloked my view with his head. The first time he really came to my attention was when he turned around to hand me the attendance list. As I wrote my name on it, directly beneath his, I noticed how similar his name was to mine: Eric Fisher.
Eric didn't look at me once and I didn't see much more of him than the back of his head. When the lecture was over, I saw his face for the first time. A week later I saw Eric Fisher again in the library. Then again in during my lunch break and on my way to the subway station.
I don't know why he caught my eye the second time and all the times after that. He wasn't particularly handsome or tall. He wasn't all that special. There was nothing that made him stand out, except for one little thing: he was one of the countless extras in the movie of my life, but this extra suddenly had a name - almost a storyline already.

When I told my mom this story, she was very disappointed with me. She doesn't understand why I haven't approached this guy. I tried to explain her that I'm not interested in him personally. I'm just fascinated: what could his story be? Have you ever thought about that? Have you ever given the extras in the movie of your life a second thought? Sometimes you don't even notice them as they pass you by in the streets, you never think about them again. But if you do give them that second thought, you might realize that each and every one of them has their own story. To them, you're nothing more than an extra. I find that intriguing. So many stories that I've never heard and that I'll probably never hear. And that's okay. I could go up to Eric Fisher one day and say: 'Hi, I'm Envy Fisher. What's you story?' I could do that, but I won't. I think I've just found the reason why I'm still single...
It might sound silly to you, but I like to wonder about the stories behind the extras in my life. I like it to stay that way. I want to keep that mystery alive. It makes life just a little more special. It's the magic of the extras in life and I wouldn't want to take that magic away.

Stay Awesome!

**Announcement! Teenage Blogger Central will be hosting its very first pilot twitter chat on Friday evening! For more details, tweet to @_TheSilverKing or @Envy_Fisher! See you there!

Once upon a time, there was a Dutch guy who didn't know what to do in his summer vacation. He decided to start vlogging. He made videos of himself while brushing his teeth, baking a pancake living his life and got a few subscribers that way. Then he broke his arm on camera and quickly became the biggest YouTuber in the Netherlands. This right here is why I don't understand the hype around vlogs. What's so interesting about watching a dude eat his dinner?
I'm not completely against vlogging though. I love IISuperwomanII's vlogs, but her life is actually interesting. If I'd make a vlog, it would be the most boring thing ever: all I do is going to college and doing my homework. Yet still a friend of mine wanted me to make a vlog. I thought it was a ridiculous idea, but I'd promised myself to get out of my comfort zone more often this year. Apart from that, I thought it would be better to show why I don't do vlogs instead of just telling you. So at the start of this month I picked up my camera to show you for once and all why I don't do vlogs.


Okay, I had a lot of fun shooting this video, I admit it. But does that mean I should do it more often? Definitely not. Did you hear how nervous I sound? Did you hear how soft my voice gets when I'm nervous? Did you notice how I struggle to speak English? Did you see the epic fail with the not-so-neutral background? Oh, and looking straight at the camera isn't exactly one of my strong points either... Apart from that, I don't want to live my life through the lense of a camera. Sure, vlogging can be fun. I love to share the awesome things in life, but sometimes I think it's better to keep them to yourself and live in the moment.

Stay Awesome!

It was a trend, some four, five years ago: forecasting the 'horror winter'. Each winter the weathermen were certain it'd happen, yet this year it remained awfully quiet in the matter. Yet still I think the trend might make it's return today on the six o'clock news: yesterday it started freezing and the temperatures haven't climbed above the zero mark since.

The result of the past day or two :)

I'm going to be honest with you: I live for this kind of weather. I thrive under sub-zero temperatures. Five years ago, the horror winter was my dream. I fondly called it the Dutch Horror Winter of Doom and eagerly awaited the first signs of it.
It would start in November, the first rumours of the upcoming horror winter. Suddenly the weather forecast would be full of pictures of past winters, the words 'snow and ice' made up 75% of the text the weatherman would say and it would always, always end with: 'This weather is going to be a long and cold one. It might become the horror winter of the decade.'
The weather forecast promised us at least a month of sub-zero temperatures. Not just any sub-zero temperatures: minus 6 degrees Celsius was the highest it would get. Snow in abundance: at least two feet. Schools would be closed, roads inaccessible. To me, that meant ice-skating until I'd fall over from exhaustion. Building snowmen twice my size. Beating my dad in a snowball fight. Sledding down the dykes. Do all that and more - for a month. That was what the horror winter promised me. On what world doesn't that sound great?

The horror winter didn't come that first year. But the next year I was promised a horror winter again. The first horror winter forecast came in the first week of November that year. The next year it came in October. Each year the first horror winter forecast came earlier, the scenerios became worse. It was like a contest between the weathermen from all the different tv channels: the first to present his horror winter forecast would win, bonus points were added for most creative and original scenerios. But my Dutch Horror Winter of Doom never came...

So the years passed by and 2015 ended without any mention of a horror winter of any sorts. 2016 started with snow in the north, then ice. A day later, the east was covered in snow too. Here in the Fisher family we're currently placing our bets: when will the first weatherman say the words 'horror winter' on national television? Tomorrow? The day after? I really don't know... After the extremely warm December we've had, it's already a surprise to wake up each morning and see that the water of the pond is completely frozen. Yet something tells me we'll hear extreme forecasts soon enough, just like all those other years.

Dutch Horror Winter of Doom, I've been waiting for you since 2010, so bring it on!
Stay Awesome!

I miss London. I miss that big busy city with all my heart. Don't get me wrong, I love living in a small town in the Dutch polder. I love to wake up on a Saturday morning and hear absolutely nothing except for some chirping birds outside my window. Yet sometimes I find myself staring out of the window at the ducks in the pond behind my house and think: 'I miss London so much.'
I spent only a few days in London back in October, but every single one of those days was filled with awesomeness. The city is so alive compared to my sleepy hometown. I had to keep my eyes open the entire time; if I blinked, I'd miss something amazing. I'm not just talking about buildings or monuments. Actually I'm mostly talking about the people. I saw so types of people I'd never see back home and sometimes I really couldn't help but stare.

Stare like that. I have a creepy stare.

Things that would catch half the town's attention are completely normal in London. Drunk man yelling at inanimate objects? Okay, we'll just let him be, happens all the time. Guy at the stop lights who looks exactly like Jon Snow? Nothing to see here. Men wearing turbans? Plenty of those around here. School class full of five-year-olds in the cutest school uniforms ever? Yeah, we see that cuteness every day in this city. Oh, and a taxi cab driver who's reading a magazine while driving his cab through the crazy London traffic? Totally normal, why does that even surprise you?

Back home I don't see any of these types of people. Drunk men usually stay inside or fall over into some bushes on the corner of the street, where no one sees them. There's not a single dude here who looks like Jon Snow (and I choose to believe I actually saw the real deal that day in London). Seeing a man wearing a turban in the Dutch polder is as rare as finding a unicorn and school uniforms have never been a thing in this country. If a taxi drives through town, everyone is surprised and wondering what kind of fancy person is sitting in that backseat.

It's nice to live in a small town, but you rarely see any colorful characters. People leave their culture at home, cabs are for posh people and if you want to get drunk, you do it at home. It's almost like a culture shock when you arrive in London as a small town girl. After a while, though, if you keep your eyes open, it turns into wonderland. No matter how hard you try not to, you'll find yourself staring at all the people all the time. There's something awesome to discover on every street corner. Compared to that, my hometown is sleepiest place on earth.

Stay Awesome!

Dear Puberty,

I think we got off on the wrong foot a little over seven years ago. I knew you were coming for me, but was it absolutely necessary to introduce yourself in the shape of a gigantic pimple on my nose? People called me an ugly witch for weeks. I guess that didn't bother you at all. Otherwise you would have left me a year or two ago, wouldn't you?
The thing is, dear puberty, that I didn't mind you all that much at first. Yeah, you screwed me over, but you screw everyone over. Every single person on this whole freaking planet will be, is being or has been screwed by you. Just a part of life, you know. Not the most fun part, but a part. You turn everyone into pimply, hair hormonal messes for a while and that's allright. Not awesome, but it's allright and you know why? Because you do it to all of us. That's fair I guess.
Fair... okay, maybe it's not fair that fair that some people get only three zits in all of their teenage year while I averaged 300 a month when I was in high school, but even that's not my biggest problem with you. It's part of the problem, but not the entire problem. My biggest problem is that you just won't leave me alone!

About two years ago I started to notice you'd done your job with all my classmates. They looked good, but I was still awkward and covered in pimples. Since I was also the first of my classmates to be covered in pimples thanks to you back in 6th grade, I got a little frustrated. Wasn't it time for us to go our own way? Apparently you didn't think so. You stuck with me all through senior year, went to college with me and even as a college sophomore I wear your red and painful signature on my face: acne.

What did I do? What did I ever do to you to deserve this? One bite of chocolate the week before I get my period and the right half of my face looks like the Himalaya! Not to mention my forehead... I've seen plenty of mountain ranges in my life, but my forehead can put them all to shame. And don't you forget about the whole making people pretty thing, puberty! You really did everything you could to avoid that with me, didn't you?
You did it for everyone, you made everyone around me freaking gorgeous, when will it finally be my turn?! I'm 19, you've taken enough time, you don't have to torture me with any more pimples. You put me through all the necessary changes, now let go! There is literally no reason for you to put pimples on my freaking face anymore! I'm almost 20, you hear me?! I don't need you anymore!
GET. OFF. MY. FACE.

Normally I end my posts by saying 'Stay Awesome', but you're not awesome to begin with. To you, dear puberty, I have only one more thing to say: Stay Away!

#3: Zombie mode has become your default mode
Sleep deprivation my old friend, what are you doing to me? There's always this moment when I look into the mirror and see that you turned me into a zombie. No, I don't crave brains, but I do look just like I'm dead and very mindless. Yet I keep on going. I have no other choice. So there I go, dragging my feet, moving along at a snail's pace, physically present but with my mind back home in bed. Once finals come around, this way of surviving is the only way of 'living' I seem to know...

#4: Procrastinating has become an art form
A quick look inside my mind on an average Saturday: "Time to get to work. But first I'll check Blogger, so it can't distract me later on. Might as well check Twitter too then. And Instagram. Blgolovin'. Facebook. Oh, someone liked an article on some dead actor from the 50's, interesting! Or not. Actually this is even more boring than my homework.
Focus. Educational sociology. Deadline is next week...
I think I heard my phone. Was it my phone? Let me check real quick before I start working. Oooooh, my friend sent me a cat video! Better watch that first!
Morning is almost over now... Might as well start working after lunch."
Seriously, the minute I have to get to work, everything suddenly becomes so freaking interesting. Everything except my homework, that is...

#5: Skype sessions with your study group end in chaos
'Envy, you there?'
'Yeah, I'm here. I can see you.'
'I can see you too. Where's Debbie?'
'I don't know, I only see her profile picture. Where's Alex?'
'I'm here!'
'Oh, now I see you!'
'Guys? I can't see you!'
'Debbie? Why are you only a profile picture?'
'I don't know!'
A full hour later only one question regarding college has been answered, yet the biggest mystery is why Debbie is only a picture... The funny thing about my study group: no matter how chaotic our skype sessions are, we always end up top of the class.

#6: Words like 'sleep' and 'vacation' are the only things that spark your interest
'Envy, have you read that book?'
No reaction.
'Envy, can you pass the ketchup?'
No reaction.
'Envy, did you get good grades last semester?'
No reaction.
'Envy, are you going to do something fun in your vacation? Besides sleeping?'
'Vacation? God, I love vacation. I'm going to sleep 12 hours a night all vacation long.'

#7: Finally have time? Well, now you have no idea what to do with it
All the items on the To Do List are done. All the exams were written, all the books read, all the essays already graded... You've found the thing that's even more mythical than unicorns: time to yourself. You could do whatever you wanted... But what?
One hour pass
Another one passes.
And another one.
Half a day later you still don't know what to do with all the time you suddenly have, so you end up doing nothing...

Let me tell you this: there are days when I'm nothing but grateful to get an education like this. But on other days, when my hair is dirty, I can't sleep and my food is cheap and disgusting, I'd like nothing more than becoming a drop-out. Or a full-time blogger. Sounds like a plan, don't you think?

Stay Awesome!

Long ago, when I was still a newbie blogger and Teenage Blogger Central had only ten members, I read a post about a Happy Jar. I'd never heard of it Happy Jars before, but the idea of filling a jar with happy thoughts and memories had a certain appeal to me. At that moment I was not very happy with my place in life, a little like now, but in a way much worse. For a while I collected happy memories on scraps of paper, but after I graduated high school I just stopped, forgot about it, didn't have time for it anymore. I didn't need it, I didn't want to write my positive thoughts down, I had a thousand reasons to stop collecting happy moments.
These days I feel like I need a Happy Jar again. On top of the 100 Happy Days Challenge, I put the Happy Jar on my list of goals for 2016. I've always been more comfortable with words than with pictures, so I set out on a mission to capture the happiness of each day in words.

If you want to make a Happy Jar yourself, you only need three things: a pen, paper and of course a jar. A life is a helpful addition too, but I take it you have one. Use it well. Wait, where was I? Right, jars. Some people get themselves a fancy mason jar. Not me. I use a plastic peanut butter jar. A bit anti-climactic, but it's the inside that counts. Apart from that, the jar of peanut butter was a present my dad bought me for Christmas 2012. He has a peculiar taste in presents, but that peanut butter sure was delicious.
When I decided to start filling my Peanut Butter Happy Jar again about a week ago, it was still full of happy memories from 2013 and 2014. Okay, 'happy' might be a bit of a big word, since some of them are now bittersweet. Still I couldn't get rid of them. I put all the happy thoughts in an envelope, which I put in a box under my bed along with all my other high school souvenirs.


I keep the stack that'll soon be like a little 2016 booklet on my desk, where I can't lose them. I'm saying that with a lot of confidence right now, but don't be surprised if you see panicky tweets about how I lost my Happy Jar project halfway through March. I have a talent for losing things.

Behold, the Peanut Butter Happy Jar!

Once I've written a happy thought or memory on each piece of paper, I put them in the good old peanut butter jar. It looks a bit empty now, but soon it'll be filled with happiness :)

Stay Awesome!

New Year's Day: you love it, you hate it or you're still too hungover and tired to realize that the new year has started. Whichever way you feel about it: Happy New Year! May 2016 be filled with awesomeness!
For me this day is full of  a strange mix of sleepiness and epic motivation. The minute the clock strikes twelve on New Year's Eve, I want to get going and make the new year as awesome as possible. I'm not jumping on the 'new year, new me' bandwagon, but I do want to grow this year. That's why I don't make a list of resolutions, I set goals for myself. I struggled a little, but came up with 8 goals - some of which I can't reach without your help! Here are my 2016 goals!

1. Do at least 5 things from my Make it Happen List
2. Complete my 100 Happy Days Challenge
3. Reach 150 followers on GFC
4. Go on a trip on my own - twice
5. Complete sophomore year with full marks
6. Collab with at least 5 bloggers
7. Write something positive on a piece of paper for a Happy Jar each and every day
8. Get out of my comfort zone: experience as many new things as possible!

I'm excited to see what 2016 will bring. I can't wait to start working on my goals.Yet this year I want to do things differently. Sure, I've made myself a list of goals and I'm extremely excited to start working on them. But this year I want all of you to be part of the journey. I'd like you to challenge me. Is there an online challenge or contest I should participate in? And what would you like to see me try this year? Take a look at my Make it Happen List and let me know which items you want to see me cross off the list this in the next twelve months. Tell me which places I should visit in 2016, send me an e-mail (envysblog@gmail.com) if you have a collab idea or support my 100 Happy Days Challenge on Instagram. Is there food I should try this year, a movie I should watch, a book I should read or a type of post you'd like to see me write? Let me know in the comments! I have the most comfortable comfort zone I could wish for, but it's time I get out of it. Challenge me and I'll do everything I can to fulfill your challenges!

Oh, just so you guys know, two days ago my dad and I were talking about followers. He was really proud of me for reaching 100 followers (which was one of last year's goals), but then he said: 'Envy, if you reach 150 followers, you'll have to buy me a cake.' I don't know why I should buy him a cake for my milestone, but it does make the challenge that much more fun. To everyone reading this: why not follow and help my dad get cake?

Do you have any resolutions or goals for the new year? Don't forget to tell me about them along with a challenge! All the best for 2016 and Stay Awesome!