There is a big part of me that really wants to start this blog post with some double entendre (yay, for being dirty-minded!), but I have decided to keep things nice and chirpy today. You see, things are looking up for me at the moment. I still don't know where my life is going, but at least I'm feeling much better. On the rare moments when I do sink back into a black pit of sadness, people like Becky from The Owlet save me by, for example, tagging me in the Self Love Tag, which is actually about appreciating yourself. Even though I'd told myself I wouldn't do tags anymore, but I couldn't say 'no' to this one; I needed some positivity.
It was a little difficult tag for me to write though. Apart from the name that makes me think of different things, I can't help but singing 'YOU SHOULD GO AND LOVE YOURSELF' while writing this post (yes, all caps were necessary because I only have one volume on the rare occasion that I sing and that's loud). Anyway, I feel like I'm getting way of topic, so I'll just get to listing the rules and answering some questions.

1. Answer all the questions honestly (damn, there goes my plan of making it all up)
2. Tag five people who you want to bring a bit of happiness to (can't I bring them pizza instead?)

The way my ex-boyfriend and I split up - over text, without giving ourselves the chance to talk our problems out. I know that his mental health made it difficult to be in a relationship and I was breaking down mentally as well, but the way we ended it was just... wrong. I regret that breakup in every single way and would change it if I could. I hate knowing I made a mistake I can't fix right now.


1) Music by De Jeugd Van Tegenwoordig. I started listening ironically, as a true hipster, but ended up actually liking bits and pieces...
2) Trash tv such as Wicked Tuna. Brainless binge watching at its best.
3) Fake ghost hunting videos on YouTube. Pure genius to see people pretend they saw a ghost while they clearly didn't and can't act.

I'd love to spend less time thinking about things I can't change. I spend too much time thinking and overanalyzing my feelings. The latter is a result of therapy and will probably come to an end some time in the future, but for now it's really frustrating to know that your mind is messing with you, yet you can't make it stop quite yet.


I used to do that a lot in October, but it's become a lot less frequent since then. Last time was exactly one week ago. I was watching the Dutch version of Ink Master and one of the tattoo artists was wearing a tiny sun hat. I don't know why, but grown men in floppy hats make me laugh out loud for ages. Every time this guy was on screen I burst out laughing and I'm not ashamed to admit that I fell off my chair and rolled over the floor laughing.


Recently that's been Sterrenstof by De Jeugd Van Tegenwoordig. Before that it was a song called Free by Emeli Sandé. Half Moon Bay by Train always did the trick when I was in high school. I could go on like this for a while, hahaha.


2) My desire to make a difference in this world; I don't know how to actually make that difference, but I can work on that.
3) My hair; all my friends hated my hair when I was growing up, but I quite like it now that I'm grown-up and don't care about high school friends' opinions.


Most of my happiest memories took place in Novato, California. Looking back on them now, it's difficult to pick just one, but walking to the pool with my friends and seeing a group of deer cross the street a few meters away is a memory that always makes me happy. It's a small but special one.

So there you have it. A little happiness, a tiny bit of sadness, and one rule left to follow: I hereby tag Kanra, Kathie K, Jerneja, The Girl with an Accent and Louise. Now you go and love yourself! (And yes you may take that whichever way you want.)

Lately I've been obsessed with words, even more than usual. I learn new words in Urdu and German while I rediscover English words that I haven't heard since I was 11. I've looked back at the words that hurt me and I hope that my way with words will shape my future.
The Text Tag matches my current mindset perfectly. I was lucky enough to be tagged for it by not just one, but two amazing bloggers: Little Robin from Little Teen's Blog and Elsie Anonymous. Thank you ladies for tagging me, I'll go answer your questions right away!



I'm very bad at creating new words. My best friend is much better at it. I think he came up with my favorite home made word. Okay, my second favorite, but my favorite is an insult and that's not nice. So the one I'll go for is 'okayish'. It's perfect for when something is not quite okay, but it's still too good to say 'meh'. That's when things are okayish.

I'm not a huge dan of fonts to be honest. I prefer handwriting over fonts. My favorite handwriting is that of my friend Jasmina, my mom's and my own (glad that didn't sound arrogant at all).

Literally. I think this is literally the most misused word in the English language. Whenever people say they are "literally dead", I cringe. I see you laughing, I hear you talking, unless you're a zombie you're not literally dead right now!

Okay, I admit that the letter X looks pretty bad ass. But do we actually need it? It's just a combination of a normal K and a normal S and yes, it does make a word look a whole lot fancier, but it's still completely unnecessary. It's an okayish letter at best.

As tags usually go, I´m supposed to pass it on. Here are the blog buddies I´d like to see answer these questions:

Literally months ago Dian from The Happy Candle nominated me for the Liebster Award. I wasn't sure if I was going to accept, because I've done a little too many Liebster Award posts throughout the years. But then I looked at Dian's post and I wasso impressed by the creative twist she'd given it that I couldn't help but accept. One of the other people who'd been nominated (back then known as Neal Kind) also did something very creative, so I felt like I couldn't stay behind. That's why I drew my answers instead of writing them down. Thank you, Dian, for nominating me and making the Liebster Award a little more awesome!

Source

Over the past few years I've learned a lot. One of those things is that I'm not exactly average or common. I have yet to meet another eighteen year old girl who only falls for fictional guys, drinks responsibly and has the next five years of her life completely mapped out.
However, every time I tell someone that I'm not exactly your typical teenage girl, they snort and say: 'Yeah right.' So after seeing this tag over at Bryleigh's blog, I decided to prove once and for all that I'm no common teenage girl. How am I going to prove that? By doing the Common Teenage Girl Tag.


1: Favorite Starbucks drink?
Contrary to popular belief at my old high school, I'm not a big fan of Starbucks. I've been to Starbucks five times in just as many years. The last time was when I was in Vienna and I didn't even order a drink (I just used their bathroom and ate a pastry I bought at some other place). When I do order a drink at Starbucks it's usually hot chocolate.

2. How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?
Ten minutes at most. I grab a pair of jeans, a shirt, sweater or tank top, put it on, brush my hair and teeth and ta-da: I'm done.

3. How many selfies do you take on a daily basis?
On a daily basis? Hold on a second, I have to calculate that.
Sometimes I take selfies because I need a profile picture for my Blogger and Twitter account. I change those approximately twice a year, but I have to take a series of at least ten selfies, because I think they all suck and that way I can pick the best out of twelve. So that's 24 selfies, then the 7 I take throughout the year when I'm bored out of my mind, and the 9 I take on vacation... Add it all up... that's 40 a year, divided by 365 brings me to 0.1095890411 selfies on a daily basis.

4. How many IG followers and pics do you have?
It took me three minutes to figure out that IG stands for Instagram (it does, right?). I don't even have an account and I don't see a reason to make one.

5. Do you ever say LOL or OMG out loud?
I have, in the distant past of 2011, said OMG out loud once. Not as Oh-Em-Gee though, more like some sort of alien word. I could totally picture an alien growling "omgggggggg" at me during an invasion. The reason I said this was that a boy called Jasper started pronouncing it this way, so I asked: "Why does Jasper say OMG all the time?'. Withing a few weeks my entire class said "omggggg" with that typical Dutch G at the end.
As for LOL, yes, I still say that out loud. We don't say El-Oh-El though, we say "lol"and it's Dutch for fun. So yes, I say that out loud a lot.

6. Do you ever wear the same clothing item more than once?
Uhm, yeah?! What else do you expect me to do? Wear a shirt and throw it away? And if you mean wearing an item two days in a row, then yes, I do that. I basically live in my Batman sweater when I don't have to go to college.

7. How many tweets do you have?
540, most of them from online wizarding duels or discussions with Neal, Catalina and Bryleigh.

8. Instagram, Twitter or Tumblr?
I don't see the point of Tumblr, I'm sorry, but it's true. I just don't get it.
Instagram would be a waste of time since I only take pictures when I'm on vacation.
As for Twitter... I set the account up to promote my blog, but now I only use it to chat with blog buddies.

9. What do you spend most of your time doing?
Working on the huge amount of assignments, essays and reports I have to write. It's not much fun, but as long as I'm not a world-famous blogger, college will be my number 1 priority. One day I'll have to take care of myself, make a living, pay rent... And I can't do all that without a proper education.
When I'm not working for college, I'm working on blog posts and novels so I can make my dream of becoming a writer come true.

10. Who are your favorite YouTubers?
Why is everyone so obsessed with YouTubers these days?
I don't have any favorite YouTubers. There's one Dutch guy who has a series of videos (actually he has several series but I only like the one) and posts a new video every Thursday. I always watch those videos, but I'm not a huge fan who freaks out every time a video is posted.
Oh, and I also have a thing for the guy from YouTube Explained. Don't ask me why, just don't.

11. How often do you do your nails?
I'm not exactly keeping track of that. What does doing your nails even mean? Does clipping them count, or do you have to polish and file them too? Either way, it's not something that I do very often.

12. Are you a shopaholic?
Only when I'm in a book store.

13. How many times have you watched Mean Girls?
Never. I'm not planning on watching it either. I don't even know what it's about, so next question please!

14. Do you own a lot of clothes?
Actually, I do. I'm still wearing the same size clothes as I did four years ago, so I've accumulated a huge amount of clothes over the years. I never throw anything away, unless it's full of holes.

15. Do you take pictures of food before you eat it?
When I eat something special, like guinea pig or Sacher Torte, I take a picture. A also take a picture when I'm eating something my friends love. For example: a friend of mine is obsessed with schnitzels, so every time I eat one I send him a pic and then we joke about schnitzels for days.

16. Do you wear make up every day?
I never wear any make up. I always end up poking mascara in my own eyes. I think looking a little bit prettier is not worth the extreme pain of having a mascara brush poked into your eye...

17. What are your average grades in school?
Been a straight A student all my life. Learning and memorizing stuff is my one and only useful talent!

18. How do you usually style your hair?
Does brushing it count as styling?

19. Do you always look presentable?
Hahahahahahahahaha. No.
I wear oversized Harry Potter and superhero shirts when I don't have to go to college. I don't put much effort into doing my hear on weekends. I just don't care that much about looking presentable. The thing with me and clothes and looking presentable is that I'm not one of those people who wants to look amazing every second. I just want to be comfortable. And that cute summer dress? That's not me. Harry Potter shirt and five year old shorts, that's me. If people don't like that, it's their problem, the can look away. As long as I'm comfortable with what I'm wearing, I don't care if others think I don't look 'presentable'.

So now you've seen it, I'm not exactly average. I'm not exactly common. I may be common and average amongst bloggers, but they're not exactly common and average; they are awesome! I hope they stay that way. Stay Awesome, guys!