Soon I'll turn 20. I'll have been on this planet for a full two decades. Doesn't that sound awesome? Okay yes, it also sounds a little scary to me. Most twenty-year-old bloggers have their blog sorted out. Me? Not so much. I'm one of those rare bloggers in her late teens who doesn't blog about fashion or make-up. Maybe that's why my blog isn't huge, I thought. So for a day or two, I thought about going mainstream. Maybe I could turn into a supersuccesful fashion blogger.
I tried for a day - and failed miserably. Now I wouldn't be Envy if I didn't share my epic fail with you guys!

What do fashion bloggers write about? I thought to myself as I walked through the mall. What do they do?
To be honest, I had (and have, for that matter) no idea what fashion bloggers actually post about. Okay, fashion. That much was clear to me. But I'd never looked at a fashion blog for longer than ten seconds.
A haul, I decided, I could do a haul post about today's shopping trip. It sounded like a solid plan - for about half an hour. That's when I realized I just suck at shopping.
First I went to H&M. I went into the store with a heart full of hope and walked out empty-handed. Yes, I was of to a great start... I then tried my luck at C&A, where my mom found me a cute shirt with little hamburgers on it. Or so she thought. Those hamburgers turned out to be Storm Trooper helmets and my mom's glasses turned out to be at home instead of on her nose. So C&A turned out to be a disappointment of the most disappointing kind. You know, one of those disappointments that make you feel empty and soulless until you buy yourself something really cool.
Primark eventually saved the day. I came, I saw, I bought the very last Hogwarts shirt in store. Plus another cute shirt. I'm such a great fashionista, I thought. Then I left the store and realized: a haul with only two shirts is a pathetic haul and probably doesn't even deserve the title 'haul'...
Back home I decided to do the haul anyway. I could have a nice little photo shoot, pick outfits centered around my two new shirts. Immediately I ran into a new problem: taking pictures without a tripod was not going to happen. I do have a tripod, but it breaks every other day. Asking my mom for help wasn't an option either. My mom is sweet, but doesn't know how my camera works... I was getting real impatient and ended up throwing one of the shirts over a chair and then taking a picture of it...

Great, that picture totally showed the cuteness of my shirt... It's safe to say that the haul thing was not working out. Maybe makeup could save my mainstream ambitions. Maybe I could do a tutorial or something. I looked at all my makeup: two cases of eyeshadow, one lipstick and old mascara. It was the most pathetic little makeup collection I'd ever seen. That wouldn't do...


I went to the store to buy new mascara, since the old one was completely dried up and older than most kids in kindergarten. In the store I was once again faced with my incompetence in these matters: I had no idea which mascara would be a good buy, so I just picked a cheap one with nice letters on it. It couldn't be a bad thing if it had a comic book font, right? And it would make for a great first product review!


So I went home to test my new mascara. I sat down in front of the mirror, opened the mascara - and poked it straight into my eye. Tears streamed down my face as I desperately tried not to go blind by accidentally poking myself again, which is always an option in my life once mascara is involved.
That was it. I was done with the whole thing. I had a new-found respect for all beauty and fashion bloggers. I'll just let them do what they do best, cause this niche is not my thing. I'm not going mainstream. Not now, not ever.

Stay Awesome!