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Lost in Translation

When I was a kid I used to 'taste' words. A new word had to be tested first. It was rolled around on my tongue, stretched and shortened, repeated until it was mine. Some words tasted great, others felt bad in my mouth. 'Emmer', the Dutch word for bucket, never felt right, whereas 'waarom', the Dutch word for 'why', become one of my favorites rightaway.
As I grew up and started new languages, I added another element to my word tasting: the literal meaning. Some words are great in one language, while they're absolute rubbish in another language. For example: the Dutch word for vacuum cleaner literally means 'dust sucker'. I'll take that over 'vacuum cleaner' any day. But to be honest, i usually think that English and Spanish words are better than Dutch words. Dutch ahs the tendencay to sound harsh and slightly angry. English sound friendlier. Except for this one case: wishing someone good luck.

My best friend doesn't speak Dutch, so whenever I have an exam he says 'good luck'. I know he says it with only the best intentions, but it irks me, as a Dutch girl, to no end. Because here in the Netherlands, we know the concept of wishing each other good luck, but we use completely different words to make it reality. We wish each other success. When someone has an exam or assessment, we simply say "Success!" to them. I don't know about you, but success is something I'd rather have than good luck.

It's the sound of 'good luck' that irritates me. As if I only need good luck to achieve awesome results. As if my result depends on coincidence and luck rather than skill and hard work. No, I don't like the sound of that. The words taste right, but they're not the words I'm looking for when I want to wish you all the best and great results.
Success is what I want to wish you. Because I know you have the skills to achieve awesomeness. You don't need good luck for that, you've got matter in your own hands. You deserve credit for all your hard work, you deserve the success you've been working so hard for. So that's what I'll wish you. Success.


We've probably never met. Maybe we never will. I don't know what's going on in your life, but I know one thing: you can do this! You can make all your dreams come true, not matter how big they are, if you work for it. So go, make your dreams come true. You don't need good luck for that. I won't wish you good luck for it, not now, not ever. No, I'll wish you success instead. Time and time again.

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7 Fellow Ramblers

When I thought of Berlin, I thought of grey buildings, a big wall right in the middle of the city and people in a terrible mood. Berlin just isn't beautiful in my mind. Yes, I am biased, yes, I've seen too many documentaries in East Berlin. My previous trip to this city couldn't change my mind: I was three years old and spent the entire time playing house in the gigantic wardrobe in our hotel room. Maybe I even found Narnia, I don't remember. Fact is that I couldn't think of Berlin as beautiful.
Last Thursday I went to Berlin again, with my college class this time. I got another chance to change my mind, but didn't. Berlin isn't beautiful. It's something else entirely.

Berlin is historical. If anything, it's historical. I don't know any European city that has been through more awfulness than Berlin. From the Olympics in 1936, it pretty much went downhill because of some nutcase called Hitler thinking it'd be a good idea to try and conquer Europe. As a result, Berlin got heavily bombed at the end of the Second World War. Then America and the Soviet Union took over the city, which eventually led to the Soviets building a freaking wall around the western part in 1963.
Berlin is one of those places where you feel like you're somehow a step closer to history. Maybe it's just because I know so much about what happened to the city. Maybe it's just because of the impressive sights. I don't know why, but when I was at my hostel in Prenzlauer Berg, I felt like I was on the eastern side of the Berlin Wall that divided the city for so many years.

Berlin is still divided. That Berlin Wall might not stop anyone from going from east to west or the other way around anymore, but if you take a tour through the city, you can still feel the division. The eastern part has more flats and apartment blocks that are just squares, but on the bright side: it also has cute stop lights.
The western part has this weird mix of modern and old architecture that kept surprising me. One moment I was surrounded by tall buildings at Potsdamer Platz, the next I found the Gendarmenmarkt with its classical style.


It's curious, but even some of the people from Berlin "have the Wall in their head", as one of my tour guides said. There's still a feel of East and West colliding. And of course the Berlin Wall still exists, not in its entirety, but in parts at the East Side Gallery.

It's unbelievable that the Berlin Wall fell less than a decade before I was born. Because of that, Berlin is a hipster. There's a place for everything and anything that's alternative and, quite frankly, downright weird sometimes. European rickshaws, Trabant cars, murals of kissing politicians. It's all part of the city now. Everything vintage, weird, alternative or unusual is awesome here. Which explains why there also are loads of hipsters roaming the streets. Berlin is the hipster of cities.


The city is something else too: Berlin is art. To quote my friend Debbie: "Everything that's ugly in Berlin is art, everything that's not ugly is architecture." We mostly said this because we had a tour guide who called every brick and every smudge of paint 'art', but there really is a lot of art in Berlin. The entire city is a canvas for graffiti and while most of it sucks, you'll see some amazing pieces if you keep your eyes open. It's awesome just walking around and discovering the little details of all the things they call "art" and "architecture". Still I wouldn't call it beautiful. Berlin isn't beautiful. It's unique, raw and rapidly developing, which makes it beautiful in its very own special way.

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8 Fellow Ramblers
"Still I cross my fingers for good luck when the bus comes close to this stop. These days, however, I hope he doesn't get on the bus."
A few months ago, I wrote these words about the guy who used to be my high school crush. I haven't thought much about him since that post went up. I haven't crossed my fingers since New Year. He never got on my bus anyway. But then, one day, he did.

"Help! Get me out of here!"
All my best friends received an SOS text on a sunny Thursday morning in March. I'd never thought I'd see this guy again onmy way to college. Why did he have to get on my bus on this so-far perfect day?
Panic rushed through my veins. What if he saw me? What if I'd lose my cool? I wanted to get off that bus, but he'd chosen a seat right next to the door. I had nowhere to go... Even though my best friend texted me to forbid me to think about him, I started looking back at the past I'd shared with this guy. At 16, I had the biggest crush of my life on him. He was smart, taller than me, had nice hair and most important of all: he liked Harry Potter just as much as I did. He made me laugh, he comforted me when I cried and if I threw my math book away in frustration he piecked it up and explained it all to me.

I looked at the guy in the seat next to the door. 'Scrawny' was the first word that came to my mind. He used to fill my world with his presence, his laughter could drown out all the noise around us. Now I saw how unfriendly his face looked when he wasn't smiling. He couldn't have been all that tall. I realized I'd probably tower over him in the shoes I was wearing that day. He couldn't fill my world anymore, no matter how hard he'd try. He'd changed, I'd changed. I knew I missed the person he once was, the person who always had my back. That person was long gone though. The guy in the seat next to the door was someone else entirely, someone I didn't know.

The bus arrived at the subway station. I wanted to walk past him and make a big deal out of not noticing him. I looked good that day, and even though it was petty, I wanted to show him I didn't need him to feel good. But he'd disappeared before I got the chance. Now that I look back on that day, I don't mind that I didn't get that chance. After my first few moments of panic, I realized I felt absolutely nothing for this guy anymore. If we'd started a conversation, I wouldn't have known a single thing to tell him. That Gotye song was perfect for the occasion: now you're just somebody that I used to know.
I thought I'd be sad when that statement would become true about him and me. Now I know I'm not. It feels good. 'Cause now I'm finally on my way to better things.

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10 Fellow Ramblers
Apparently April is A-Z month. I, as the busy college student who's busy binge watchig YouTube videos, was not aware of this fact. But then one all-changing morning, I opened a new tab, went to Twitter and saw Be from Love from Be tweet about her A-Z post, which told us all kinds of awesome stuff about herself. My reputation as a blogger was saved (don't tell anyone that I couldn't keep a straight face while writing that sentence), as I could write one of these posts too. After all, I'm very skilled when it comes to sharing random facts about me, myself and I. Let's get started, shall we?


A is for Athletics
Some kids grow up in a home where baseball or soccer is at the same level as religion. I'm not one of them. In my home, athletics took that place. If my parents had lingered around a little longer, I would have been born on a track in The Hague. I was barely three weeks old when I "cheered" my dad on at a race. At eight years old I became and athlete myself. The sport has become part of my DNA and if anyone so much implies that it's stupid, I get teary-eyed and upset in name of the most beautiful sport on the planet.

B is for Books
When I learnt to read, my mother immidiately gave me a library card. I averaged ten books a week. I devoured stories. Before I started this blog, I tried my hand at book blogging. I was too busy fangirling to write any good reviews though. Right now, I'm pretty sure books are the love of my life.

C is for California
While I'm a Dutch girl who loves being Dutch (the thing is, it's pretty awesome), I am also very proud of the American part of me. I spent almost all my childhood summers in a place called Novato, just a few miles north of San Francisco. This is the place where I learnt English, this is where I became me, thanks to the most wonderful friends I could ever wish for.

D is for Dreaming
I don't mean the thing you do when you're asleep. Most of the dreams I have at night are not the kind of dreams that would make you happy. No, I'm talking about day dreams, dreams that you want to come true. My head is filled with big dreams and I'll never stop chasing them.

E is for Envy
'Envy', a word that's usually not associated with the best of emotions, is the name I chose for myself when I started blogging. It's a pen name, but one that fits me like a glove. Not because I envy people all the time, but because it sounds bad ass and it gives me the feeling of empowerment that I need to keep chasing my dreams. I'm starting to like it better than my actual name, but that's mostly because no one pronounces my real name correctly...

F is for Fandom
Okay, I might have made fun of fandoms in the past. I might have said their rules are too strict. And yes, I called fandoms a curse. But the truth is this: as long as you find your own place in the vast world of fandoms, they're great. I'm nineteen now and proud to say I'm a Potterhead. Fandoms are the best.

G is for German
No, I'm not German. Being Dutch is a completely different thing. I study the German language though, so I can become a high school teacher. It's my third language and even though some think the language sounds 'evil' (believe me, if Hitler had spoken French, that language would've sounded evil) I like how it sounds and I love how Germans can stick four words together and say: 'Look, we have a new word!'

H is for Hello
Lots of people have called me anti-social in my life. I admit that I'm not the best at starting a conversation, but still 'hello' is one of my favorite words. Most friendships start with that one simple word. I hope to hear it from a lot of my future friends and I'm trying my best to say it more often to new people too.

I is for Illustrating
I used to think I could become a famous artist. That was before I decided I sucked at art, which happened shortly after my art teacher decided I sucked at art. 
Now, years later, I've found myself doodling little turtles on vacuum cleaners and chibi versions of myself in cosplay outfits. I'm even thinking about writing and illustrating a children's book. 

J is for January and July
My two favorite months are January and July. July because it's my birthday month and I get to travel, January because it's often the coldest of them all. Cold January days make me feel alive like nothing else does.

K is for Kan't spell
I speak quite a few languages and when you do that, you face some problems. For example: how do you spell the word 'apartment'? In German it seems to change every time I open my dictionary, in Dutch there's a double P situation and did I just spell it wrong in English? Spelling is not my thing anymore...

L is for Later
My best friend would tell you he's the Champion of Procrastination, but on a good day I could beat him. I always tell myself I'll do something later. I'll write that blog post later. I'll take that picture later. I'll send that e-mail later. By the time I finally do it, I'm usually too late.
But there's also an other aspect to my Later Philosophy: Later I'll go to Cuba. Later I'll get to visit Karachi. Later, when I have a job, I can travel. 
Later is the word that teams up with my dreams - or my procrastinating...

M is for Multilingual
Dutch is my first language. English my second (but most used). The German comes in third and since April 10th I am also a certified speaker of the Spanish language. I was born with a desire for words, doesn't matter from which language. I collect them like some people collect rocks or shells. I'm multilingual and proud.

N is for Narhwals
It's a weird story. A story I've shared on this blog not to long ago. I even added an illustration. Let's just say narwhals were a big part of my high school days. You can find details right here.


O is for Overexcited
Overexcited is the adjective that suits me best, especially when it comes to movies and books. I can be seen bouncing around the house with excitement after seeing a trailer for a new Marvel movie. I can not shut up about a new favorite book and nothing can stop me from sharing all my fangirl love with all of the world once I've found something truly amazing.

P is for Plans
I plan things. Lots of things. Things that'll probably never happen. I already have plans for the summer of 2017, even though there's only a 1% chance of that plan working out. The thing is that I'm not sure what I should do with my life, so if one plan fails, I want to have a plan B to keep myself going, and a plan C just to be sure, and a plan D in case of disaster.

Q is for Questions
So I have plans for pretty much everything. At the same time, I question everything. I question my choice of clothes, my ability to learn a new language, I even question who I am about 90% of the time. Sometimes it drives me crazy, but the never ending stream of questions is just a part of me that I'll have to accept.

R is for Really
'Hello' is one of my favorite words to hear and say, but 'really' is the word I use really often. I don't use the word as often in Dutch, German or Spanish, but in English I use it all the time. After a while it gets really annoying, so I'm really paying attention when I'm writing to avoid that I use this word really often.

S is for Space Police Radio
If you follow me on Twitter, you might have seen me tweet with the hashtag #spacepoliceradio. Space Police Radio is the name of my group of close blogger friends and one dude who decided to stop blogging, but we've forgiven him because he made us this cool sort of group picture. Just kidding, but when it comes to squad goals I just laugh; I already have my perfect squad, they just live on the other side of the world.

T is for Travel
If you take a look at my vision board, you'll notice that this is what I live for: exploring the world. Hopefully I'll meet a lot of awesome bloggers along the way.

U is for Urdu
Since passing my final exam for Spanish, I've decided I need to focus on a new language: Urdu. I've already learnt a few words and sentences here and there, but now I've got time to take things serious and study. I'm meeting more and more awesome Pakistani bloggers like Kanra, so why not learn a bit about their language?

V is for Vacation
Vacation is my favorite time of the year. Such a cliche, things turn cliche because they're true, don't they? Vacation is that time of the year in which I'm not just able to travel, I finally get to put some real work into my blog. As soon as one vacation ends, I start counting down the days until the next.

W is for Writing
Would it surprise you if I told you that writing is what I love most? I write every single day. Blog posts, bad poetry, stories. One day I hope to be able to publish a novel, but I'm not ready for that. For now I'm just going to focus on blogging and finishing the vampire story I published on here a little over a year ago already. I should really get going on that.

X is for... Xylophone? Xenophobia? X-men?
I don't play the xylophone... I don't have xenophobia... I love Marvel, but I don't know much about X-men... I can't think of any other words starting with X. Let's pretend that this letter doesn't exist, okay?

Y is for You
I've never been my own biggest fan. I often think I'm not good enough. Which might be why I care so much about you. You, my friends, my followers, my blog buddies, mean the world to me because you think I'm cool. I feel honoured to be part of your life and hope you'll let me be part of it for a long time. Without you I would never be me.

Z is for 'Zei ik toch!'
'Zei ik toch', Dutch for 'I told you so'. I'm sorry, but I love using these words. For some reason people tend to ignore whatever I'm saying, but in the end I'm more often right than wrong. Yes, I'm that kind of person.

From A to Z, those were all the more or less interesting things about me! What would be part of your alphabet if you made one?

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4 Fellow Ramblers
It's marked on my calendar in big red letters: Berlin. From April 21st till April 26th I'll be in the German capital with my college class. My mom is glad college is offering this chance; Berlin is familiar territory and I won't be all alone in a big city. Loads of people will keep me from getting into trouble, she thinks. She's not worried about this trip at all. No, she's worried about the word on my calendar that's covering May 2nd till May 7th: Ljubljana.
My trip to the Slovenian capital will be my very first solo journey and while I'm well-prepared, my mom isn't sure I'll survive...

'Envy...'
'Yes mom?'
I away from my half-filled suitcase to look at my mom. My mom likes to sit on my bed and watch me pack my stuff. She did it when I went to Rome, she did it when I went to Vienna and she did it now that I'm going to Berlin. It's part of the reason why I'm such an early packer: if I don't do it now, my mom will do it for me tomorrow. 
'Please promise me you'll return healthy from your trips.'
I snorted. 'What makes you think I wouldn't?'
'Your habit of forgetting to eat, like in Rome And forgetting to drink, like in Vienna. Food poisoning in Peru.'
'Mom,' I said while trying no to laugh, 'that was all years ago. I know how to stay healthy now. If I wanted to, I could even write a blog post on how to stay healthy while travelling!'
'You think you could do that?'
'Yes, just watch me. I can give advice.'
My mom's look told me she didn't believe a word I was saying. 'Oh yeah? Then how are you going to keep yourself from not forgetting to eat?'


My mom thought she had me there, right with her first question. I'm one of those people who easily forget a meal once they're in some interesting place. Because hey, that tree looks cool! Oh look, a bird! Woah, that building is so beautiful. Wait, wasn't I supposed to do something?
Especially when I'm on my own I forget about food, which is one of the most important things to keep you going while you're out exploring the world. So I have a food schedule. It may sound lame, but for some people it's useful to keep an eye on themselves. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, simple as that.

'Food schedule. I set alarms on my phone and make myself have three proper meals a day.'
My mom isn't one to be impressed easily, but I could tell she hadn't expected that answer. I was able to put a few shirts in my suitcase before she challenged me again: 'You don't even eat fruit when you're home, are you going to do that while you're away on your own?'
'Of course.'
'Drink enough water?'
'Yes mom, I've got a plan.'

Plan might be a big word I used at that moment for the simple thing I had in mind. I would have liked to use the word 'strategy', but my mom also isn't impressed by fancy words for small things. You see, whenever I go out by myself, I realize I fail at adulting. I'm very bad at taking care of myself and easily forget things. So to keep myself aware of the fact that I sadly can't live on chocolate bars, I buy one piece of fruit every day while I'm away. When I leave my hostel, I always take a piece of fruit and a bottle of water with me. Under normal circumstances I forget about both fruit and water, because of the cool trees and birds and buildings I already mentioned. So when I go out, I put that piece of fruit and the bottle of water right on top of all the other things in my bag. That's a good thing because your fruit won't get squashed and every time I need to get my phone or camera out of my bag, I'm reminded of my duty to eat and drink like a responsible adult (Did you hear that? That was me laughing because I just can't imagine myself as a responsible adult).

'Okay,' my mom said. 'Maybe you know what you're doing. Maybe.'
'I told you so. I could totally give others advice on it too.'
My mom smiled. For a few minutes she let me pack in peace. When I was about to close the suitcase, I looked at her and said: 'Mom, you're just worried 'cause I'm so chaotic, aren't you?'
My mom smiled again. 'Yes. You have to admit that you have a knack for getting sick or getting yourself injured. What if you need a doctor while you're in Berlin?'
'Mom, I study German, I'll just yell "Arzt" really loud.'
'And that'll help you in Slovenia too?'
'I can say "doctor" in Slovenian yeah.'

I prefer not to get sick or injured while I'm away. It would be weird if I did like those things. I keep an eye on myself, try to eat healthy food around the same times each day. I generally try to prevent any kind of mishap, but shit happens. And when it happens, it's always nice to know some basic sentences and words like 'Where is the hospital?' in the language of the country you're visiting. Just to be sure.

'So what's 'doctor' in Slovenian?' my mom asked. She had a twinkle in her eyes. She loves to hear me say things in a new language.
'Zdravnik'
'Good. Sounds very Slovenian. But what if no one knows where to find a doctor?'
'There are sites and services for that, mom.' I picked up my cell phone and showed her.

I'm going to be honest with you guys: every time I go out there's 50% chance something will go wrong. I'm very clumsy and usually not that health-oriented. So sites like Amino help me out when I, once again, forget to take care of myself. The site helps you find a doctor. You tell them what your problem is (I mean asthma for example, being chaotic doesn't count in this case), how far you're willing to travel and also takes health insurance into account. Oh, and don't worry if you're chaotic like me, the site will guide you through all the steps and offers reviews and information on all doctors who could help you out. Honestly, it's so easy to use, I couldn't make a mess of it, which says quite a lot actually. Not even my mom could mess it up as she sat on my bed, trying the site for herself.

My mom wasn't sure what to think at first. A site that matches you up with doctors, based on criteria you can set, was not something she expected me to know about. But after a few minutes of skepticism (because Amino is in English from start to finsih and we're Dutch and with some mom-logic that's a reason to be skeptic for a minute or two) she approved of it. Well, not just of the site, she approved of most of the things I'd said and decided I knew how to get myself around the world without dying.
'But Envy?'
'Yes mom?'
'You don't really think you can write a post with advice on staying healthy while travelling, do you?'
Well mom, I think I just wrote that post.

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8 Fellow Ramblers
It was October when I discovered this glorious channel called Buzzfeed Video. One video of Americans trying Indian food and I was completely hooked. I thought nothing could top the taste tests, but I was wrong: the Try Guys were even better.
When it came to Buzzfeed, I'd been living under a rock until that day. I didn't know there was a website, neither did I know you could write for it or that becoming a Buzzfeed writer was an option. But now, about six months later, I've found out five reasons why I'll never be a Buzzfeed writer. The reasons will astonish you!



#1. Not a nostalgic 90s kid
I was there in the 90s! Well, from 1996 till the end I was there, but my main focus was eating, sleeping, and being an adorable little baby and toddler. The things I remember are playing outside, watching the Lion King and knocking over the stack of VHS tapes, because the Lion King somehow always ended up at the bottom of the stack. But am I nostalgic? Do I miss the typical 90s stuff?
No. Okay, I miss climbing trees and playing in the woods, but which kid didn't do those things? You don't have to be a 90s kid to miss childhood. So sadly, I won't be able to contribute anything to Buzzfeed's beloved 90s lists.

#2. How do you do gifs?
While everyone who's ever written a Buzzfeed article has an appropriate gif for every situation, I'm still trying to figure out how to pronounce the word. I simply suck at it, both at pronouncing and using gifs. It's not for lack of trying though, but every time I try I end up throwing my hands dramatically into the air, thinking: 'What am I doing wrong?! Why can't I freaking do this?!'



#3. My Dutchness
Now let's take a step back. There's Buzzfeed UK, Buzzfeed Canada, Buzzfeed India, Buzzfeed Japan... Probably some other branches too. But Buzzfeed Holland? Not gonna happen. We Dutch people prefer to read in Dutch or stick to regular Buzzfeed, 'cause we love everything American and the rest is way too exotic. So no Buzzfeed office for me to work at.
There's also the thing about being white and some Buzzfeed branches (*cough* Buzzfeed Canada *cough*) seem to prefer minorities...

#4. Wait, what am I supposed to write about? Is that a person?
I know one Kardashian: the one that was compared to an orca when she was pregnant. There's not a single boyband I really like. I'm trying hard to come up with a third example, but I'm failing miserably, which only proves that I'm not good at the whole celebrity thing. I don't care much about the 'awesome' celebrities, I don't care about the regular famous people and I definitely don't care about the shitty celebrities. So how would I ever be able to write about something completely crazy like the 1D baby conspiracy? Hats off to the person who wrote that one by the way, but I don't see myself pulling it off.

#5. 21 things about... shit, I only know 4
I've done my math. On average, my list posts contain 6,4 items. Buzzfeed lists? Well, I didn't do the math for Buzzfeed lists since I've reached my math quota for this month by analyzing my own posts. Anyway, I'm pretty sure we can all agree that their lists are much longer than mine. They have this things with 10 and 15 and for some reason I don't get, 21. If anyone knows why, do tell me.
Either way I'll never be able to meet that criterium, because this is only my fifth reason why I'll never be able to work at Buzzfeed and uhm... I'm kind of done...


I wouldn't say no to a job at Buzzfeed. Acutally I wouldn't turn any job offer that involved writing articles down. But let's face it: I'm no good for this site.
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My mom is one of the loveliest people I've ever met. Also one of the kindest. And also one of those people who believe that a cup of tea will make every situation better. I don't remember a time when my mom didn't drink at least three cups of tea a day.

Just like every other little girl, I wanted to be like my mom when I was three years old. I'd already found out that baby dolls should be glad they weren't real babies with me around, and my tiny plastic kitchen was the biggest mess a three-year-old could make without putting effort into it. Playing house wasn't my thing either, so I was set on doing that one grown-up thing that seemed simple: drinking tea. My mom bought me special children's tea. It scared me to drink  something hot, because I'd never done that before. But I did it, because I wanted to be as cool as my mom. Besides, the package it came in was pretty bad-ass: it had a princess on it who was doing magic with her sidekick: a dragon. Now let's be honest, who wouldn't want tea if it looks that awesome?
My first sip was a deception though. My mom was the most awesome person I knew, and if I wanted to be awesome like her, I'd have to drink tea. Slowly, drinking tea together became a real mother-daughter thing.


When I started kindergarten, my mom would always have a cup of tea ready for me when I came home. We'd sit down at the kitchen table and talk about my day. My mom would ask me what I'd learnt ("Nothing, I've already finished this week's book"), how my teachers were ("They won't let me start a new book") and with whom I'd played during recess ("Me and Carlo tried to fly today!"). Then she'd give me cookie and the world was great again.
Nearing the end of my elementary school, when I was bullied by pretty much everything that breathed, tea time turned grim. I'd usually come home crying, but my mom was always there, ready to comfort me with tea and cookies. Sometimes I wanted to throw my cup of tea against the wall, or burn myself with it. It were dark days, but my mom and her tea got me through it all. Tea time was often the highlight of my day.
High school came and went, tea time stayed. My mom would still ask me the same questions: did you learn something new today ("Cucurbitam describe is Latin for Draw a pumpkin"), how are your teachers ("My Ancient Greek teacher said that if I keep talking at this rate, I'll soon run out of words to say") and what did you and your friends do during lunch break ("Lars pulled a prank on Geoffrey while I was drinking and then I laughed while drinking and water came through my nose...")?  I don't know what made tea time so great: sharing stories with my mom, eating cookies or drinking cinnamon flavoured tea. I guess it's the combination of the three that made it so great.


Now I'm in college, sophomore year is already coming to an end.. After all these years, my mom and I still drink tea together every time. There have been some moments when we deeply regretted drinking tea together, especially after the Gingerbread Tea Disaster of 2013 or the "Spring Breeze Flavour" Failure of 2010. There have been days when we drank half our tea, then decided that it was way too hot to be drinking tea, or days when we looked at each other and said: 'We should've made ourselves hot chocolate." But on average, tea time with my mom is among the best things in life and I'm so grateful to have my mom and her tea in my life.

It scares me to think that one day I won't be able to have these moments with her. One day she won't be here anymore with her cup of tea and a shoulder to cry on or a smile on her face when I tell my stories. It's a fact that makes me very sad, but it also makes me appreciates drinking tea with my mom much more. If there's one thing my mom taught me over the years, it's this: tea isn't the solution to everything, but it's certainly a good start.

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It happened on an almost daily basis when I was an overexcited four-year-old. I'd run into the house, yelling: 'Dad, dad, I need my bike! Can you get it out of the shed?'
My dad would look up from his book and ask: 'Which one do you want?'
It was one of the toughest questions I had to answer as a kid: which bicycle would I take for a ride today? There was the tiny purple one that went really fast, or I could go for the black one covered with 101 Dalmatians stickers. The rusty one was also an option, just like the mountain bike and the pretty white one my grandparents had bought me. And I still had my tricycle, but that was for babies.
In the end I always chose the tiny purple bike, because it was so light and fast. My dad would take it out of the shed and soon I'd be off to join the bicycle races I held with the other kids from my block.

Growing up in the Netherlands, I never realized that it's a bit odd to have five bicycles when you're four years old. Every kid from my street had at least one bike and if you still had your training wheels on at age five, you were a total loser. The faster and better you could ride your bike, the more popular you were. I think I was 10 when I noticed that the bicycle culture is a typically Dutch thing. In a country of 17 million, we have 20 million bicycles. It's part of who we are, just like cheese and tulips. My bike is my bae, I don't feel complete without it. Because here in the Netherlands we get put on a bike almost the minute we are born and stay on it till the day we die.

Meet my loyal friend: my bike
At age two we get our first tricycle or a miniature bike with training wheels. Bikes define your status in those early years and the competition is fierce. Everyone wants to have the fastest, prettiest and biggest bike. If there's and image of a clown or a lion on your bike, you're basically the king or queen of the playground and when it comes to wheels, size does matter.
About a year later the training wheels come off. Every three- and four-year-old will be practicing as much as they can, because they all want to be the first to win a bicycle race without the training wheels. Let me tell you, it's not easy to get rid of those things. I was three, almost four when my parents decided it was time for me to become a big girl. My dad took the training wheels of my tiny purple bike and said he'd catch me if I fell. We started out easy: my dad held the bike straight as he walked behind me, while I was busy trying to cycle and not fall over at the same time. Suddenly my dad picked up the pace and started to push me. Faster and faster we went. I loved it - until my dad said he'd let go of the bike. I looked over my shoulder and saw I was cycling on my own. 'Look ahead, Envy! Go go go!' my dad cheered me on. For half a minute everything was amazing. Then I reached the curve at the end of our street; I panicked and fell over.
At the end of the week I could ride without training wheels. I was queen of my street for about two weeks, until the other kids mastered the skill too.
After this one big step we Dutch kiddies go everywhere by bike. We go to kindergarten, the supermarket and grandma's house by bike- of course with our parents on their bikes right next to us in case we fall.

The mindset of
most cyclists here
A couple of years later, around the time we learn to read and write, the first kids show up at school on their bike, but without a parent. That's when everyone starts begging their parents to let them cycle to school all by themselves. And when your parents finally give in, you once again feel like a queen - queen of the world this time. Especially when you cycle past all the kids who still have to cycle to school with their parents. They see you rollin', the hatin': elementary school cycling in a nutshell.

For a couple of years nothing changes. Then, at 15 at the very latest, the Dutch change their attitude and become fearless daredevils as soon as they get on their bike. You're not a real Dutchy if you haven't avoided a major accident by mere seconds - without wearing a helmet of course.
That's how almost 100% of our population grows up on a bike. And once they're all grown up, you don't want to be an unsuspecting driver. We cyclists don't stop for anyone or anything! The road belongs to us!

Stay Awesome!
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About me


Envy. Dutch blogger. Est. 1996. No relation to the famous biblical sin. Worst bio writer on this side of the blogospere. Lives on cookies, apple juice and art. Friendly unless confronted with pineapple on pizza. Writes new nonsense every Thursday.

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