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Lost in Translation

School started again. Biology, history, maths, all my classes started from the point where we'd left them last year.
Latin was no exception. Though we had a rough start in this case. Not because we weren't able to translate apoem, but because of the content of the poem...

Translating Latin is one of my many, many useless talents. I look at a text like it's a riddle I've got to solve. That's the only way to make Latin fun, since most Roman writers are narcistic as hell or long-winded. Or in some special cases, they're just perverts.
In December, just before the Christmas vacation, we started translating poems by a poet called Catullus. I disliked the poems, because the first one was about a little bird and how awesome that bird was. The second one was about the same little bird and was all whiney because 'Oh no, my beloved bird is dead!'
And then we saw the glossary for the third poem. Let's just say that it's down right awkward to translate a poem about a man who's planning on having oral sex with 200 men at the same time. It's even more awkward when you make a mistake and your poem suddenly is about a man with 200 dicks...

After laughing your ass off (and feeling like you've written a porn) the shame kicks in and you realize that you have to learn this poem for your finals. I'm okay with dirty poems and jokes, my friends make them all the time. But when you have to learn a poem written by some kind of rapist, then it suddenly becomes more than awkward, it becomes inappropriate.

According to my Latin teacher, who apparently thinks these poems aren't inappropriate whatsoever, the worst was still to come. I didn't believe him. Until today.
Classes started again and I decided to take a look at the next poem. I translated the first line and... well, it wasn't pretty...
Conclusion: Latin is for perverts. And since my class is full of perverts, the next couple of lessons will be the most awkward lessons in the history of Latin.
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Envy. Dutch blogger. Est. 1996. No relation to the famous biblical sin. Worst bio writer on this side of the blogospere. Lives on cookies, apple juice and art. Friendly unless confronted with pineapple on pizza. Writes new nonsense every Thursday.

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      • Latin is for Perverts

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